Monday, June 24, 2019

Are you a clothes collector?

By Kathy Hamilton

I know for sure that I’m not alone in this.

As far as I can see, a very high percentage of crossdressers or people in the community seem to have the same issue (or is it a problem?) with clothes. First, we can’t resist buying new clothes—and once we buy clothes or accessories from En Femme, they are for keeps, they are forever, no matter whether we wear them once, twice… or never! In short, we never throw them away…unless we decide to purge which I’ve spoken about in a different article. Take a pause here and think carefully: are you like me, do you have a ratio of at least ten or more times (seriously) more female clothes, accessories, or shoes than male clothes or items? Does your female wardrobe make your collection of male clothes look miniscule by comparison?

By way of example, I have 2, maybe 3, pairs of male shoes, yet over 50 pairs of female shoes; 5 pairs of trousers, yet 60+ skirts; around 7 shirts, yet…, hmm.., well I’d better not say how many tops I have! If I took a photograph of the extensive wardrobe space she occupies versus the single-door compartment he has, I know where your sympathy will lie! Suffice to say, I think you get the picture. But maybe ownership of this extensive range of clothing is partly due to the fact that I never give any clothes anyway; never throw out any item of female clothing, shoes or accessories (well, unless the item is totally beyond use or repair, but that’s unusual). I guess some of this desire to hoard is genetic as my mother is a bit of a hoarder, but when I ponder the real reasons why? I can come up with several key excuses, sorry, legitimate reasons, why I like to hoard:

In the early days of crossdressing it was necessary to surreptitiously buy female attire or underwear from real shops or markets (before the days of being able to go online and buy whatever you want from En Femme); secrecy was paramount and many purchases, especially of underwear, were rushed and embarrassing; there was simply no way one wanted to be revealed as a crossdresser to the shop staff.

To be honest, many of the items I bought during such times have emotional value and I can fondly recall the times and trepidation and/or thrill of buying this dress or that underwear set. I may not ever wear such items again but that’s beside the point!

A fair number of my female clothing items were bought on impulse (something which, when in male mode, I will never do: at such times, I am careful and rational to the extreme). I may have worn the article in question once or (oops, shouldn’t say this) never wear it at all. Actually, to be fair I’m not that bad but do have a few of these impulse clothing purchases still hanging in my wardrobe with the labels on; or shoes standing in the cupboard in their boxes, and which have never seen the light of day since I bought them. Yet, I sometimes look at these items and think I might, just might, one day wear them, either as is or with some adaption: so no point to throw them out!

Then there are the dresses (maybe too long) or skirts (too short) or cardigans or tops which I no longer (temporarily, I hope) like or are no longer in fashion. I always think my views on what suits me may change or, as fashion is so cyclical, believe one day some of these items may come back into vogue. So why give them away?

This one is hard to admit but, fundamentally, I don’t like to waste anything I have paid good money for; even if it doesn’t quite fit or look right on me, now and then I have good intentions of taking the dress or top or skirt to a capable seamstress and having it made shorter, smaller or the zip replaced… but when? Next week, next year, never… I’m not sure.

So, as you can see, once I have bought that new dress or skirt from En Femme, it will be mine forever… whether I needed to buy it or not! In any event, whatever reason(s) we all find for collecting our lovely feminine clothes, could it be that buying (and hoarding) clothes far in excess of our needs is actually necessary to appease the dominant female persona who dwells within many of us? After all, she controls a large portion of the way we think and act in our everyday lives…

Does anyone have a better explanation?

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