Comments on CrossdresserPhotoBlog - Articles about transgendered life and Crossdressing: Overwhelmed

Oh my, you poor dear. Whilst I may not be married ...

2009-08-12T15:14:07.265-04:00

Oh my, you poor dear. Whilst I may not be married nor attached, I still sympathize with the fact that it takes over you're life.

For me, putting on that mask of make up gives me license to do things I never dared to do as a boy. Like a dangerous,sexy Charlie's Angels on Testosterone; I go out and return home not wishing to to return to boy mode.

Thanks for your comments, everyone! Sandra, i was...

2009-06-27T11:38:53.862-04:00

Thanks for your comments, everyone! Sandra, i was particularly struck by your comments because you went into such detail. and, i hope you know, many of us can relate to each step you describe. it's not easy! and it won't go away. so each of has to find the right sense of balance for ourselves. the world will change eventually. i'm confident of that. and each little thing that we do in our own lives is part of that change.

Yes, most all of us have gone through what your ex...

2009-03-30T00:48:00.000-04:00

Yes, most all of us have gone through what your experiencing at the moment. I'm over 60 and still have visions of myself in mini skirts etc. A long skirt and sandals worked fine at the DMV though.
I would suggest you focus more on keeping your shape so that when you go past that 40 year old mark that you can still put it together when your in your 40's,50's & 60"s. An old lady by then? Perhaps, but you'll still want to go out to dinner and to a show with people and you will have a lot more courage by then. It'll be more important then ever to you then.Enjoy your youth to the fullest but plan for the long haul. Have you seen pictures of "Boy George" lately? Don't go there !

A friend sent me this very well done article, and ...

2009-03-28T23:06:00.000-04:00

A friend sent me this very well done article, and I must say that I've found what I think will prove to be a wonderful place to frequent.

In my own life I've had to live less of a 'double life' as time has gone on. I've made friendships that are great both in vanilla and kinky ways. Extended family has figured out that sometimes it's best just not to look at things very closely. All in all, a slow process, but a very good process for having to hide so much of oneself away is not healthy nor fun.

Oh wow. Naturally, I'm not surprised that you echo...

2009-03-27T21:52:00.000-04:00

Oh wow. Naturally, I'm not surprised that you echo my thoughts exactly. Perhaps I wouldn't become a show girl or get locked in a domme's dungeon, but certainly walk around much more en femme. Even if currently I hardly have courage to enter my car and drive around (much less leave it!). I'm still at the webcam phase...

And yes, as time passes, I start thinking more and more about how I would reorganise my life to allow me to be longer en femme. 15 years ago or so, when I lived with my parents, I could only go out during my vacations. My dream was to get my own home so that I could dress more. For that I had to work insanely hard — which left little time left for my CDing. When I finally got my own home, my partner came to live with me shortly thereafter — and I hadn't told her yet. As so often happens, most of my outfits were given away at that time — I thought I couldn't afford to dress again, ever. But, alas, you can't "cure" yourself, even with drastic measures, and the nagging urge to dress again only increased... so my next stage was to prepare her to accept my "other self" — which took several years. Finally, one day, I couldn't bear the thought any longer that I had to keep away from dressing, and I had to trust our long relationship to last this big revelation. It certainly did! But when I finally told her everything, 4 years ago, we were both poorer than church mice. So, again, it meant working hard again to get some extra money for buying a new set of outfits ;) Then, of course, I realised that there would be next steps again: clearly, if I ever wished to become a full-time CD, I would have to drop everything: job, family, friends.

The first stage seemed to be the most obvious one. I don't see myself becoming a CD prostitute — probably the only paying job for a CD in my country. That would be way too tough on me — and I'm too old anyway! I also have a very low libido, which is unusual for CDs, but definitely a drawback :) Sooo the choice was to run (again) my own business, but this time, do it from home. Well, I'm not completely unsuccessful — I barely manage to survive, and the number of hours away from home has shrunk dramatically — but the thing is, I have to work twice as many hours as before, leaving almost zero time for CDing. And then the whole thing becomes more and more complex. Do I really wish to be seen by my neighbours (I live in an apartment), who are mostly elderly and intolerant people? Granted, I could just go out late night, but — what about shopping for food? Neighbours would certainly notice it! Also, is it fair for me to subject my adored partner to a life of being stigmatised as the "wife of a freak"? No, so that means saving even more money to get away to a different neighbourhood, and live in our own home, and not in a flat. More work! Less free time! Then we will have some kids, and while at a very tender age, they won't really matter, at some point they will start asking questions. That will mean keeping away from CDing for a decade or two — or work even harder to keep a second house where I can dress at will, but only for a few hours at most. Until, well, the kids grow up and leave the home. And what will happen when finally I manage all that? I'd probably be 80 years old by that time :) Will it still matter to me anymore, or, worse, will I still have a mind that cares?

No, like Cici, I don't get depressed by this. I think it helped me to shape goals and a purpose: each step is incredibly more difficult than the next, but the challenge of doing it "just because I wish to dress more time" is quite an incentive!

Still, I naturally wish it were way easier.

I do understand how you feel, oh so well. And I do...

2009-03-23T13:12:00.000-04:00

I do understand how you feel, oh so well. And I don't think you were being too negative. We do have two lives, and each requires attention. Do I wish we could just go out and nobody would care? Sure, it'd be nice. But you know, I'll still do it because it is important to me. And that's all that matters